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  • Topic: Discovering Your Six Human Needs

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    • October 2, 2009 5:17 AM PDT
    • Discovering Your Six Human Needs

      Did you now that there are six needs that we as a people need, not want but actually need in our lives in order to be whole? Well I wasn’t aware of them individually per say until I listened to Anthony Robbins explain and describe each one in full detail. One thing though before naming each need, they all revolve around on principle. And that’s pain and pleasure. We as a people want a little of pain, and a lot more of pleasure.

      Lets talk about the first four needs, to begin. These are what Tony Robbins calls the survival needs. Meaning most people already “get” these needs, because without them, you could not make it. The other two needs are categorized as fulfillment needs. Not too many people get this far in their lives. So after reading this, and become aware of these needs, you can aspire and bring your life to fulfillment.

      The first need is certainty. We love to know if something is a sure thing. We like to be comfortable, and we avoid pain like the plague. And naturally so. We freak out when we don’t have our certainty, such as things not being in our control. Company is being acquired, will you be able to keep your job; are your kids doing drugs; or you need to go to the doctor for a mammogram because you are at that certain age where it can get scary, and you just don’t know how the doctor visit will turn out. We like our certainty, and we go out of our way to make sure we can get it. And what happens a lot of times is that we strive so hard for our certainty, that we become bored. You have a career, nice home, vacation home, kids in a great schools, everything is going according to plan and you just don’t want to take the risk. But that’s what life is about, taking risks. If you knew everything thing that was going to happen to you, life would be boring, and that’s what happens, which brings us to the second need of uncertainty.
      Just how we need to be certain in life, we also need to be uncertain. We need that mystery, surprise, the excitement, the unknown. It gets us going and gives us something to look forward to. We can not be happy unless we grow, and get into the unknown sometimes. Tony Robbin’s said “The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty you can comfortably live with.” If you have to be certain all the time, then you are in prison, and you’ll be completely unfulfilled. Its in the realm of uncertainty that your passion is found. Tony says that middleground is the closest thing to a grave. Keep your hunger alive by being in the uncertainty and in the uncertainty you’ll find your hunger.

      The third need is for significance. The need to feel special. Your life having purpose, you need to be needed. Some folks level of significance is higher or lower than others, but it is still there otherwise we wouldn’t be able to survive. In order to be significant, you must also be unique. There are lots of superstars who use their who career and strive after being unique and different, that they become too unique and sort of isolate themselves therefore being unhappy and sad. Which brings us to the next need that generally comes after significance, and that’s love.

      The fourth need is connection and love. We all need and want to be loved. What we really need to do is learn how to treat and love ourselves as good as we want to treat others. We all want to love other people, but we don’t show or treat ourselves that same love. Unless you create a good relationship with yourself first, how can you love someone else? You can’t. People have so much hurt and pain within themselves buried so deep, that they wonder why they keep having failed relationships. If you find yourself resenting someone elses success, you have just sealed yourself from being able to succeed. Who you spend time with is who you become. Most people’s lives are a direct reflection of their peer group. Your peer group is anyone that you care about who or what they think of you. If you set a high expectation than your peer group, they will have to either come up to your level, or you need to form a new peer group. Whatever you do, you don’t want to drop to their level. And if your peer group is your family, then just love your family, but choose your peers.

      Certainty, Uncertainty, Significance, and Love are the four survival needs. We all are doing and receiving those on a regular basis whether we know it or not, but needs five and six are needs that most of us never get to in our lives. They are titled the fulfillment needs. What we need in order to be at total peace and to have a inner joy within ourselves that no one, or no thing can take away or destroy.

      The fifth need is growing. We all must be forever be growing. Any living organism must continue to grow. Look at a plant for example, if a plant isn’t always spreading its branches, spreading into new soil, constantly being watered and showered, it dies. Same with us, we too must grow, or we die. I read a statistic that stated once a person graduates from high school, the likely hood of that individual to read a book for pure enjoyment or growth was less than 2%.

      Lastly, we must contribute beyond ourselves. In science, we know that anything that doesn’t contribute is eliminated. We must give back and help others. Whether you have a little or a lot, give. Whether that be of your time, by volunteering or you giving financially, no one achieves true success without someone’s help and generosity, so why not help someone else as you were helped.

      As I explained earlier, the first four needs are just pure survival, the last two include a recipe of living your life to fulfillment. Most people just survive out here in this world, never achieving fulfillment. Do you want to just survive or live your life to fulfillment?

       

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